Yuuzai
by Katsuragi Misato
Summary: Takes place during OAV 2. Chichiri overhears Tasuki and tries to give him some comfort.


Author's Notes: Okay, minna, this takes place during OAV 2, between episodes four and five. Ano, I haven't actually SEEN this yet, so I'm operating under the assumption that no one knows that Hikou was behind the water that caused Tasuki to nearly rape Miaka. And I don't know how long Chichiri wandered before he got to Taikyoku-zan, so gomen if not all the facts are correct. *sniff* Poor Chiri... There might be a little shonen ai in this fic, BTW, dakedo... R+R!!!!!!

~*~

Tasuki crushed his eyes shut against the images that flashed before his eyes, trying to block out Miaka's frightened face, clapped his hands over his ears to block out her anguished screaming, her terrified pleas for him to stop. He curled up into a tight little ball, praying to Suzaku for this torment to end, but the images and sounds were repeated through his tortured mind like a litany, over and over and over...

"_Stop it!!!!!!!_" The images abruptly vanished and he was left alone in his tent again. Tears of grief streamed down his face. "Doushite? _Doushite?!_" He knelt among the jumble of blankets, his fiery hair in disarray, illuminated by the flickering light of a single candle, and sobbed his anguish into the bleak, callous silence.

~* ~

Chichiri raised his bowed head, roused from his trance by the tormented weeping carried by the wind. He looked back down for a moment, unsure of what to do. _This is something he needs to take care of on his own,_ his mind whispered. The sobbing continued unabated. _But if I leave him like this..._ Memories rose to overwhelm his thoughts, memories of himself after Hikou's death, of the pain, the grief, the guilt ... the loneliness... He rose from the ground, wrapping his kesa around his shoulders, and pulled back the flap of his tent, stepping out into the still night.

~*~

"Tasuki?" A polite voice cut through Tasuki's grief-mazed world, a brilliant ray of light slicing through the darkness surrounding him. He uncurled long enough to register a warm chocolate eye and hair the color of a summer sky.

"G'way!" he snarled, turning back in on himself. Chichiri stepped into the tent, closing the flap behind him. "I _said_, 'Go _away!!!!!_"

"Naze?" The voice was calm and filled with compassion. Somehow, this just enraged him even more. Tasuki leapt up and slammed his fist into Chichiri's face with all the force he could muster. Chichiri reeled backward under the hail of blows Tasuki rained down on him, but offered no resistance. If this was what it would take to help his friend, then he could bear it. Tasuki, abruptly coming to his senses, pulled his blow, his eyes wide and filled with horror. _This was his best friend!!!! _This was _more_ than his best friend; this was _Chichiri_, the man he... Tasuki choked back a curse, staring at Chichiri's bloody face in mixed shock and revulsion.

Chichiri dipped the corner of his kesa in the bucket of icy water at the side of the tent, calmly wiping the blood from his face.

"Ch- Chichiri..."

"Hai no da?" The monk looked up, face clean now.

"Ore wa... Ore wa..." Tasuki looked stunned.

~*~

Chichiri studied his friend in the flickering light the candle provided. He took in the tears streaking his face, the once-vibrant eyes now blank hollows in his face, and the pale, sunken cheeks caressed by the dancing shadows. He reached out and enfolded his friend in a warm, comforting embrace. Tasuki struggled. "Leggo o' me, Chichiri! Leggo...." Chichiri's arms were gentle but firm, and Tasuki's struggles subsided as he sunk into the protective circle of the monk's arms, heart-wrenching sobs breaking from his parched lips.

"Chichiri, Chichiri, gomen..."

The blue-haired monk ran his fingers through the liquid fire of Tasuki's hair, rubbing his hand in gentle circles over the taut muscles of the bandit's back.

"Tasuki-kun, I'm here no da. Daijoubu. Buji na..."

Sobs wracked the shuddering body in his arms.

"Ore ga.. Ore ga shi ni aitai suru.. NAZE?! NAZE ORE GA SHINU NA?!"

Chichiri tightened his hold. "SORE GA DAME DA! It wasn't your fault. It was the water, Tasuki-kun no da. You don't deserve to die," he said in a quieter voice.

Tasuki looked up in anger. "How would you know?! I nearly raped her, for Suzaku's sake! You couldn't _possibly_ know what it feels like to hurt a friend like that! You don't know anything about that kind of pain!"

A flash of sorrow crossed Chichiri's face. _Hikou..._

"Tasuki-kun, I'd like to tell you a story. Long ago, there was a young man named Houjun. He was engaged to be married to a beautiful girl. Her name was Kouran. She was sweet and kind, and Houjun couldn't have been happier. Then one day, Kouran came running up to him in tears. She said she was breaking off the engagement because of an "incident" with his best friend. Houjun became enraged. He sought out Hikou, his best friend, and confronted him. They got into a fight, but while they were facing off, a flood swept through the village and killed both Kouran and Houjun's family. It reached the clearing and tossed Hikou over the edge of a cliff. Immediately, Houjun forgot his anger and grabbed for his friend's arm. He held on with all his might, but as he clung desperately to Hikou's arm, a log rushed toward his face. He reflexively raised his hand to guard his eyes... and lost his grip on his friend. Hikou plunged to his death with a cry of accusation."

__

"Houjun! Why did you let go?! Why are you letting me die?!"

Chichiri opened his eyes and looked sorrowfully at Tasuki. "In one moment, he lost both his best friend and his eye." His fingers traced the lines of his scar. "Houjun wandered for months, wanting only to die. Eventually he came to a great mountain, where an old woman took him in. That woman was Taiitsukun, the guardian of the world. He became a monk in her service, taking a new name. Chichiri. Eventually, he found the Suzaku no Miko, and dedicated himself to protecting her. He's traveled far and done many things, but still he holds the pain of that long-ago loss."

Tasuki met the single grief-filled russet orb with his own dazed eyes.

"Chichiri..."

Chichiri smiled sadly, the grief in his eyes mirroring Tasuki's own.

"Chichiri..." Tasuki's voice was gruff. "Will ya.. will ya stay with me t'night? I lo- Er, I don't wanna be alone." He blushed and looked down, toying with the edge of the woolen blanket, smoothing non-existant wrinkles from the rough surface and mentally cursing himself for the slip.

Chichiri smiled genuinely. "Hai, Tasuki-kun no da." He put the candle out with a single muttered spell before taking the bandit back into his arms.

"And.. I love you, too."


End file.
